I hour past midnight

My Najihah has one more paper to go (SPM) but she looked as if as she had gone through all the subjects...I am so worried coz she seems so relax..Inilah jadinya kalau periksa lama sangat...sampai sebulan. kan elok ikut sistem dulu..seminggu je...dah boleh merdeka

. I remembered when taking my SPM way back in 1983 with my STF friends...The last paper was Sejarah...and, I was so anxious to 'get rid' of the exam that didn't study at all that night. I chatted with my monitor, Gina the whole night before the exam until we got sleepy and we went to bed early...like 10 o'clock or something...Hey, I got C3...not bad for a person who didn't study much like me (I think).

So, (pertaining to the topic), it's i hour ++ past midnight but I'm still wide awake..Teringat macam2. Things in the future and of course, memories...Argh, It's not easy to be forgotten...especially when my kids were small...dalam berbelas tahun yang sudah...they were so cute, so darling and quite easy to handle...(mentally)and my life is nothing else but THEM. It was not that complicated but a bit hard, I would admit...imagine handling 6 young children between the age of 3 months and 14 years old all at once.

My husband was really a great help. He was so close to the children. He used to bathe and put clothes on them. He would ride them in the car around the taman every morning before going to work...He would feed them with food during meal time..etc...etc...I don't know if my children still remember this...

Well, it was quite a memory. It's really something that I would like my children to remember forever...How close and bonded we all used to be. Now, that almost everyone have left home ('Adilah, Amirah and Asyraf are in the pursuing their studies in the university and 'Ayah' travels almost every week to KL and other places)I sometimes feel that I have lost 'them'...I hope it's just my 'delusional' feeling...maybe I just perasan sorang sorang...I don't know :( . But i hope things would be better very soon. Tak boleh cerita banyak2 di sini. Nanti hati jadi lagi sebak...

So, goodnight everyone...Sweet dreams and hope things would be better for everyone tomorrow... :)

p/s: He always said, "Mana ibu?" every time he came home from work...Dah terlalu lama tak kedengaran...Dunia semakin changgih...banyak benda lain yang ada di depan mata agaknya.